ProgrammerHumor
pirateSoftwareShowsOffHisSecurityCode
Discussion
You're not lying, he broke the server so hard that its refusing the connection
Yeah but did you know he worked 8 years at Blizzard?
Mopping the floors?
No he was an elite haxor red team giga chad.
Phew, that was close.
..using social engineering. He's an engineer. He makes my hate engine towards liars going.
What that's my IP Address? Am I in trouble please help
Logged in first try.
must change the passwort 127.0.0.1 uses the same password as my luggage.
This is fake. The great Goblin Lord would never do that! He would instead test the ipaddress against a global map with all possible addresses (for security so he doesn't leak your address) so it would look like if(ipaddress == global.secret_ip_lookup_array[0]){...}
are you sure? he might just use case 1 through case 4294967296
Or would he do nested switches for all four parts of the IPv4 address? IPv6 is instaban for now because it will take a while before it gets properly implemented
This made LOL at the idea he would just completely ban ipv6 addresses because he doesn't know how to implement them.
(artificial deep voice): "Look, right now ipv6 addresses are disabled. What should you do? I don't know, maybe get a normal ip address like the rest of the world? Chat should I ban this guy? You're banned... for having a shit ip address."
I had to disable ipv6 to download a Magic Arena update because of some weird reason
yeah pirateSoftware prob worked there
His dad worked there for 23 decades and he's 1st rate 2nd generation magic arena employee.
He's a third rate duelist with a fourth rate deck.
Had to disable IPv6 to update EA anti cheat for F1 24.
stretches "That's on you buddy"
IPv6 reckoning is coming. REPENT!
-But Thor that's not how it's supposed to b-
-"And what am I supposed to do for you? I'm out of mana"
*Posts Mana Gem*
"Guys, look one of those people who harass me all day"
You have been permanently banned from this Chat.
Psst each parts called an octet, but pilate software would probably use magic numbers then comment them rather than an enumerator
Pilates software ;)
Thank you correction although much like his code Pilates has a repetitive nature :3
Woops, I knew that word but couldn't remember it that fast... Thanks for reminding me!
a nest for each bit.
I would use numpy to generate random numbers between 1-4294967296 and store them in a pandas dataframe, that way you can loop that df later to see if you've already checked that IP!
if(ipaddress == global.secret_ip_lookup_array[0]){...}`
if(ipaddress == global.secret_ip_lookup_array[1]){...}
if(ipaddress == global.secret_ip_lookup_array[2]){...}
if(ipaddress == global.secret_ip_lookup_array[3]){...}
if(ipaddress == global.secret_ip_lookup_array[4]){...}
if(ipaddress == global.secret_ip_lookup_array[5]){...}
You're making the list bud
You forgot the painfully obvious and useless comments in your code, you're going on the list yourself bud, hope it was worth it.
If only there was a way to write that in fewer lines of code
Why is this hard? Have a list of bad addresses, all else are good.
if(badIPs.includes(ip){return 1;}else{return 0;}
stretches
Still wrong. He would at least use a switch statement.
Honestly the worst part isn't even the code, it's the font...
I wish there was some trusted service to ask for trusted localhost IPs
Only after bragging about someone plugging something in the wall and because he walked in the room at that exact moment he got a defcom black badge
Are the yanderedev and pirateSoftware the same person?
At least yanderedev didn't call himself the Bob Ross of programming
wait, jason software said that??
"People call me the Bob Ross of programming, which I think is a pretty big honor 'cause I like Bob Ross' stuff"
Direct quote from one of his shorts
Which is also funny, because Bob Ross finished around 30000 paintings but this poser can't finish one game's code for 8 years
No way. Link??? I need to laugh
We found his origin story! He's just coding cuz he thinks it's fun and he knows he's not good at it!
"Anything we don't like, we'll turn it into a 5s no-context clip or something; we don't make mistakes, we just have harassment by haters."
I feel dirty for twisting the zen words of acceptance into complete stubbornness and wilful ignorance
This clip has to be the most heinous shit I've seen from this guy so far. Comparing himself to that legend, he's not even a tenth the man Bob Ross was. Fuck that guy.
I'm not an expert, but I'm pretty sure "People call me Bob Ross of programming" is not the same as "I'm a Bob Ross of programming" he doesn't control what people call him
Did anybody really call him the bob ross of programming?
Between all of the comments in his YouTube shorts, it wouldn't surprise me if someone said that.
Having said that, I still choose to believe he just made it the fuck up. It's in character.
Whether he did or didn't, he certainly claimed it and made a short about it.
That is nuts and downright insulting. Bob Ross honed his craft, inspired others, and was always well prepared for taping. He didn't just hop on the air, talk about how great he is and just "wing it".
Jason Pirate Software here spends most of his time verbally talking about how great he is.
He can't even be bothered to read up and check his understanding before creating hours of videos giving his misinformed and vulgar opinion on a subject. He reads the headline, imagines what it's about, then trashes others' work in front of millions of viewers.
Bob Ross - "Mistakes are happy little accidents."
Jason Thor PirateSoftware - "Eat my entire ass."
No, he just said they did.
Bob Ross of programming and Bill Cosby of furry world what a pair
Isn't YandereDev a pedophile?
no he just built a highschool dating sim and is really into loli and teenage anime girls absolutely nothing to do with being a pedo
/s
If anyone is the Bob Ross of programming then I nominate Sebastian Lague. Well put together videos, explores interesting topics in an easy to follow manner, actually finishes the stated project over the course of the video, and you could easily use his longer videos as white-noise to fall asleep to.
I have always said that PirateSoftware was 1 incriminating chatlog away from being Yanderedev, but I just saw a video of him actually having a chatlog posted about a guy of 11 years younger he was doing furry ERP with while he was married (yet insisting on monogamy with that person).
Dude is seriously the new Yanderedev. Solo dev, ain't releasing shit, can't code if you put a gun to his head...
I know a lot of people that do ERP but still feel their relationship is monogamous. Its RolePlay, not reality.
As long as they're open with their partners about it its fine
Right... But Pirate was married, tried to force his ERP partner to "only have him", which is also a person he slept with, and apparently had another ERP partner on the side as well.
The issue isn't the monogamy itself, it's insisting on monogamy while having several other partners at the time who are unaware of the others. One of the other ERP partners even said they thought it was an open relationship where they told each other of their partners, only to run into another partner at a con who brought it up.
Dude even made a website to post the logs on, receipts included. Piratesoftware.sucks. And Thor responded to it, clearly acknowledging that they were, indeed, friends at once point and complaining that the person who allegedly was his "open relationship" buddy refuses to attend cons now.
No yander is better
Nah lets ship them
Yandere toppping Pirate is now canon.
I'm imagining that famous shrek x shadow picture but it's pirate and yandev
To abu dhabi.
Unironically, he was only starting programming when he did the popular code, he did improve after that.
In contrast, Pirate software was a dev for 20 years, and in Blizzard for 7 years when writing this code.
He wasn’t a dev, and while he worked at blizzard he was doing non-software roles. He’s not a software person, he has always been basically a social engineer “hacker”
he was a qa tester at blizzard and a social engineer with the dept of energy
Well I believe Yandere Simulator actually released? So 1-0 for YandereDev I'd say
It hasn't, it's still in the same "pseudo early access" state.
I might be misremembering, but didn't he make a video where he sat on YandeDev's code?
Having seen some of Yandere Simulator's code, no not in the least...
This 'screenshot' is faked to be awful and it's still better than some of the stuff in that gods awful silicon-foresaken nightmare of a """game"""
Now I want to see his IPv6 code .... must be something like 10^38 lines.
(I know it's fake but the though is funny)
Just let chatgpt make it
Funny enough, I thought I'd try chatgpt to see if it would even list all IPV6 combinations, or IPV4 combinations possible and it refused every single time.
7-15 characters per (decimal-notation) address times 232 addresses is on the order of dozens of GB of text. I'm not super familiar with how LLM billing works, but unless Bo Burnham has made a song about you, you probably can't afford it.
ipaddress? Why would my ipad have a dress smh my head
How long have you been holding on to this one? 🤪
Wrong, he'd write is as:
```` //Assume hacker var is_hacker = 1;
// Check for 132.201.211.158 - known not hacker if (ipAddress.equals(ip_address_list[0]) == 1): is_hacker = 0;
// Check for 158.1.63.127 IP - known not hacker if (ipAddress.equals(ip_address_list[1]) == 1): is_hacker = 0;
// Check for 127.0.0.1 IP - Me :D if (ipAddress.equals(ip_address_list[2]) == 1): is_hacker = 0;
etc etc etc ````
Writing even these first three lines gave my fingers cancer.
This has to be fake 🤣.. funny regardless 😂
If you know of a better was to keep track of hackers than a giant list of every ipaddress in the world set to 0 and then when a hacker is detected going in and manually changing the 0 to 1, I'd LOVE to hear it. If not, keep your mouth shut.
You got me there! 😆😂😂🤣🤣😂🤣
Hope it was worth it bud, you just made the list.
I know this was a joke but while thinking of weird solutions, I realized a bit set for every IPv4 address could fit in half a gigabyte, which is big if loaded in memory, but surprisingly reasonable as a seekable file. Obviously this is also terrible but surely that has to be better than the if snake, right?
Personally, I would write down each IP address by hand and put a big red X over it if they are a hacker. Then I take a photo of that and store it, and then I can manually check every IP attempting to connect.
Come on now, we're programmers, we can automate stuff! Obviously you should use OCR on the image and do a regex search for the IP address to see if it hasn't been crossed out.
Ugh, can't we just pay someone in India to do it for us manually and call it AI or something?
and when the ISPs rotate IPs around between customers, we go in and manually correct them
For performance a hashmap should be used. Or a switch statement perhaps.
Yes, you could make the code open source, implement CI/CD to prod and let people push code without PR:s.
That way you don't have to update the files yourself!
It is fake however his game code has some similar stuff. The whole story control structure is an array with 300+ indexes with magic numbers, arbitrary int values and its only indetifiable via inline comments at the definition
Also most of them should be booleans but he used 1s and zeros, when he got called out on it he said his programming language doesn't support boolean values (it does), then when called out for being wrong about that he tried to argue that using booleans is bad programming.
What was his argument?
A call to authority, with him being the authority
When you put it like that it amazes me even more how **nobody** called him out on **anything** until the WoW raid and the SKG initiative drama, really goes to show the power of social perception and status, dude tarnished everything because he can't say "yeah my bad, I'll do better"
Why use 1 byte when you get 3 for free!?
I forget if C pads bytes to the next word or not. I want to say it does, and it makes me wonder if GameMaker Studio does since I'm not familiar with game dev.
It depends on the aligment of the other fields of the struct
Gamemaker does that, all the actual info is brought together in the editor UI.
I love spreading misinformation online, where the dolphins?
I mean, just being honest, most code handling game logic in any engine is an absolute nightmare of a rats nest that looks a LOT like that. It's kind of the nature of your requirements being something between a script that uses existing handles, and a need to have explicit control over some part of the underlying systems.
Does it look awful? Yes. Am I going to extend the underlying systems to cleanly expose those capabilities that I'll likely only use in this one part of game logic? Fuck no, I'm gonna hack that shit together with the equivalent of popsicle sticks, duck tape, and a dream.
Yea I saw some in a video, and saw the exact one you are mentioning. But it really looks like the code i saw, just wasn't the code i saw.
WAIT! Wait, wait, wait. Are YOU telling ME that r/ProgrammerHumor allows fake posts?!
That's ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous!
See the thing is, that i DIDN'T know if it was fake. Because i saw some of his code earlier and it looked just like this, except it wasn't this specifically.
So this COULD be fake, I still don't know.
This is fake. He worked at blizzard, he knows how to hack the CIA, FBI and the Statue of Liberty mainframe /s
Yeah and also worked for nuclear plants but was too passionate about making games so he quit.
Totally not made, exactly like his voice, totally not voice changer.
Yeah and also worked for nuclear plants but was too passionate about making games so he quit.
Hacking them he claims, while his "hacking" at Blizzard was mainly if not all social engineering by his own accounts if you actually listen to the stories.
i think it's also in his linked in where it says it was social engineering
I’m not defending the dude, more stuff comes out and it’s just…eugh. However, a voice changer program isn’t the answer. His voice either naturally deepened, or he trained over time to speak like that. There are videos of him at some award thing for twitch I think. He sounded just the same.
Thanks for adding the /s. I thought he could really hack the statue of liberty
what's really nuts is when you scroll down and see
1.1.1.255
1.1.1.256
1.1.1.257
...
1.1.1.999
shh,,,don't tell him that the octets go to 255
...but he worked at blizzard for 7 years!
I wrote almost a billion lines of code
*The billion lines of code in question:
Wasn’t this guy QA at blizzard or something? Now he runs around pretending like he’s a grizzled game dev veteran
according to his linkedin all he did was write phishing emails to test security
Oh so he just tried to take down the people who actually do the hard work and send them to security training for a couple hours. Like a tech speed bump
I mean it’s important for people to know how to avoid stuff like that; else you wind up with even more massive corporate data leaks than we already have.
I think phising tests are important but the people who issue them are not hackers, and in most cases are probably not even programmers.
If you've got credentials worth a fuck, don't bitch about phishing tests. You are a potential weak link in internal security
I've worked at 2 places that had dedicated phishing tests and never fell for a single one.
He worked with hacking nuclear power plants for the government as well, but it paid too well so he quit.
Yes, I am serious. He has said this.
He quit because they forced his 10 weeks a year contract to be 30
Wait until he knows about IPv6
Also i like that this makes no sense in terms of programing, also it makes even less sense in terms of networking. Many adresses here wouldn't be assigned as public adresses. Or are just companys' adresses like 1.1.1.1 (cloudflare dns) 8.8.8.8 (google dns), you get the point.
I guess that's why they're not hackers!
Where do all this memes from this guy come lately?
he basically became yanderedev 2.0
he always had a bad rap for being a talentless nepobaby who did part time qa at blizzard, makes it his entire personality, then says dumbass "hot takes" on livestream. well he said some extremely stupid and hypocritical shit about a dude that is pretty universally loved by the online gaming community. so yeah, pretty much yanderedev'd himself now everyone is going to make fun of him now. he is also genuinely awful at programming, yanderedev levels of awful and has a massive ego to go with it.
What is with this yandev slander? This guy makes yandev look like a genius by comparison. Yandev is a system times more productive than him despite spending 2/3 of every day responding to hater emails. Yandere sim gets meaningful updates often enough that he doesn't need to make trivial updates to keep steam from flagging it as abandoned and delist it from the store.
Plus he went through puberty twice and we hate those people.
Who did he said stuff about? I'm out of the loop
Ross Scott / Accursed Farms. I'm not actually sure he's as universally loved as that comment implies. He's not unknown, but he's also not a markiplier or jacksepticeye or anything like that.
He's known for making the Freeman's Mind series, the Game Dungeon series, and more relevant to this topic, a series called Dead Game News, where he talks about games that are dead or dying - that is, games you can no longer play or soon will be unable to play. He's probably most known now for starting stopkillinggames.com, which is "a consumer movement started to challenge the legality of publishers destroying video games they have sold to customers."
PirateSoftware, the guy in OP's image, is critical of the movement and has been critical of Ross, and the internet at large is now critical of him (they'd been critical of him before too, but the intensity has certainly increased).
I guess from the recent upheal of the Stop killing games petition where he pretty much sabotaged it by being a dumbfuck and not reading or try to get in contact with the guy behind it to get a better understanding And i believe bigger YouTube channels talked about it as well couple weeks ago giving the petition a boost
I don't expect him to know about prefix tree, but at least use a hash-map or a set.
tree count as extrended grass - he will not touch that.
also hash maps? we don't do drugs in this house here! no hash for you!
:-P
Unfortunately he would just claim the language doesn't support it if you suggest using any data type other than int, string, or array
Not sure what language he is using, but usually if it doesn't support it then you can add it.
For example C has structs which is the default if you need a complex data structure which isn't supported by default.
You want a "Sword" data structure? Sure, its basic values are int and string and you can store all these in a single variable.
But I guess that is too complicated.
Gamemaker.
It doesnt have native support for booleans. They do have constants for true and false in the documention they recommend using for whenever they actually implement it.
I honestly dont understand why a boolean would not be natively supported from the get go. Seems like values greater than 0.5 are considered true.
Fuck I'd just query a database at this point, it'd be faster than what he's doing here.
Oh, I knew it with the name of Tries
I understand that being a gamedev does not equal to being a coder... but brother what is that
That's a weird way to optimize CIDR bitmask comparisons
"optimize"
I still can't figure out what he's trying to do.
What is this? Why doesn't he just print the ipaddress?
EDIT: Just read OPs explanation lol I guess this is how it looks like if you never took CS classes. I guess I'd have done something similar if I was 15 years old or never had learned about hashmaps, sets, dicts, or even arrays. But even then this code doesn't make sense.
if (ipaddress == 'x.y.z_ip') { return 1; } hacker
Wouldn't this make it much easier?
Dude stop acting like you know better than him. He used to work at blizzard. Show some respect.
This made LOL at the idea he would just completely ban ipv6 addresses because he doesn't know how to implement them.
And not with monospaced font!?
Once this mf learns about for loops it's over. OVER. Hearthstone or whatever his game is called is gonna be a COD killer!!!!1!
No way this is real. This has to be a meme right
It is, but it's so realistic for him that it is believeable
It's all fun and games until IPv6
He is still busy with IPv6
Now try IPv6
What in the yanderedev...
oh shit I didn't know that yandere dev worked for blizzard that's awesome
Ain't no way bruh
Web dev here. Could you just use one line of regex to cover all of this?
The answer to all questions involving this guys code is yes there is an easier, faster, better way to do this or it needs to be hard deleted and replaced with an entirely different system of doing things.
That's right, keep karma farming the guy. It's not annoying at all.
Love the vitriol this goober is currently getting. Guy is an absolute toolbag
Fuck that guy
Guys, this is too much. Doesn't this make you feel uncomfortable? I know drawing attention to actual mistakes is good to make sure juniors don't learn bad practices from him, but putting his face on random badly written code not done by him is not memeing, it's bullying.
I've seen the code and while i know game code can be 'creative' in its implementation, what I saw isn't the standard, right?
If I made a PR at work with a similar implementation to problems i would probably have to wear the dunce cap, or be walked out.
walking up to people with a clipboard and awkwardly asking them to scan their employee id card is not hacking
Please tell me this is fake. Please God
I have coming across a lot of posts of this guy. Can some enlightened one could let me know who is he ? And why is he getting so infamous?
Edit: Pirate Software, Thor, Jason Hall
He is a streamer and self proclaimed hacker (his words). He got to YouTube and twitch fame by generally being entertaining and outwardly being a supportive and well-meaning guy with usually relatively based opinions. He develops a game for 8 years(!!) now and does so sometimes live.
For me it started with his first interactions with the stopkillinggames.com initiative. Where he blatantly and, in the end, maliciously misrepresented it and, supposedly on his own, brought it to a halt. I think there were more factors, but he did his part.
Then followed a few single player game cheating "scandals" to make himself look good. Then one or two blatant misbehaviors in online games.
Currently he gets harshly taken apart for most things he does because most are not what he likes them to look like. Coding proficiency is the latest and honestly a little funny.
In the end he seems to be a person who is not able to admit fault or being wrong, which makes him insufferable to many. And he stands by opinions that are objectively just bad because of this. He is a master deflector, at least by the frequency he does it and is never responsible for anything himself.
Oh, he worked at Blizzard ... Sorry, had to say it.
I only watched a couple of his yt shorts, but never watched any of his live stream(because every time I tried to give it a shot I got bombarded by TTS donations)
What's he doing to get meme'd on Reddit so much recently? I know he against the "stop killing games" for whatever reason, are there more?
What is a general opinion on PirateSoftware programming skill?
I took him for being good, since he shows his programming and has such a heap of followers, but lately I've started to doubt.
What’s an iPad dress and where do I get one?
Y'all need to go outside and touch grass lol
I'm not sure why reddit is so obsessed with this guy
Y'all's obsession over this guy is getting very Gamergate.
PS is such a phony
What the fuck lol
Hopefully he doesn't write conditionals for IPV6
if IPV6detected() { return 1;} //IPV6, could be hacker.
Ipv6 enters the chat
Wait till he starts his ipv6 list
Good luck with IPv6.
Oh please tell me he pulls that off the referrer header.
why can't he just use a fucking subnet mask. or a wild card. Come on.
To be honest, it shouldn't be perfect; the solutin should work!
I'm sorry, wouldn't all those if statements slow it down when it boots up?
This guy is my inspiration; he has actually made a profitable game, despite a lack of skill.
That's it, you're on the list buddy. Hope it was worth it!
I've reported your account to Reddit, that's on you.
Hope it wasn’t your main account.
Fuckin nailed it
Let's wait and see how long it takes for Reddit to ban this guy.
Forwarding this to my team of lawyers right now buddeh
I'm not your buddeh, guy.
I'm not your guy, pal.
fake stretch
Welcome to the finding out timeline buddy
Oh yes, The list, of course! There is no list.