ProgrammerHumor

bePreparedMates

bePreparedMates
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Discussion

Sufficient_Zone_1814

English was invented outside the United States. Y'all going to shut up from tomorrow?

11 hours ago
KomisktEfterbliven

That would be so fucking epic

10 hours ago
sweetytoy

Don't give hope to my introverted ass.

Edit: wait a second, I'm not even American and English is not my language.

10 hours ago
ameatbicyclefortwo

Oh fuck that'd be nice.

9 hours ago
pawala7

One can only wish.

10 hours ago
decker_42

Why would they tax English? They don't speak it.

9 hours ago
ThePupnasty

"We SpEaK 'mUrIcAn HeRe!"

6 hours ago
dashingThroughSnow12

Time to learn Micmac or Cherokee.

10 hours ago
skildert
:p:

English was grandfathered in. It's basically legacy code.

4 hours ago
Thenderick
:g:

Natives would be celebrating hard if that were the case

7 hours ago
Warjilla

No, you only have to start hablando español.

10 hours ago
FirexJkxFire

Nah but we will put a tax on it now.

Could you imagine! Our ability to engage in speech being tied to our wealth! We would never do such a crazy thing

glares at Mitch McConnell

4 hours ago
Rare_Local_386

Well that’s why in America they use american language

4 hours ago
Aggressive_Bill_2687

I see you've also fallen for the internet myth that Americans speak English. 

4 hours ago
Ozymandias_1303
:cs:

Just like when Microsoft "invented" C# after trying to make their own version of Java, we're going to invent a new language called "American."

3 hours ago
gesocks

So you can only use some indigenous languages or klingon from now on

3 hours ago
wggn
:j:

US switches their official language to Cherokee

3 hours ago
pissy_pooper

Wait the British did not Steal it?

10 hours ago
VolcanicBear

FFS, we borrowed parts from fully functional languages.

If we stole it, it'd be in a museum.

9 hours ago
pretty_succinct

i mean...

the manuscript (or at least a large portion of it) for the Oxford English Dictionary is keep at Bodleian Library which is very much a museum in a sense of the word...

8 hours ago
lNFORMATlVE

Eh, actually successive invaders made their language the language of the land or injected it into the existing native language (Anglo Saxons with old english, Normans with french influences)

The “fully functional languages” where those invaders came from underwent further functional development and underwent external influences just like ours.

6 hours ago
NicholasAakre
:r:

They did. English is actually three languages in a trenchcoat.

9 hours ago
masterflappie
:j:

None of which were stolen. It's natively Germanic with Norse and french being forced upon them

4 hours ago
xSilverMC

They did, but not from america

7 hours ago
Facts_pls

Yes. The English language - famously stolen by the English people.

7 hours ago
LordAmir5
:c::cp::j:

Whelp. C# it is.

11 hours ago
nwbrown
:clj:

Except by OPs logic it's Danish.

10 hours ago
nonsenseis OP

Missed in this bill. Will do another bill next week. Thanks for the reminder

8 hours ago
greebly_weeblies

Bill got withdrawn. Sept 1 now.

8 hours ago
nonsenseis OP

Are you a time traveller?

8 hours ago
tcpukl

Bill gates?

7 hours ago
AgentSharkSmart

And Typescript aswell

4 hours ago
DarthSatoris

I just had a look, and yeah, C++, C# and PHP are all developed by Danes...

That is actually kind of nuts.

1 hour ago
PsyborC
:cs:

Let's hope that Anders Hejlsberg didn't write it while back home in Denmark.

EDIT: Missed it

10 hours ago
Shehzman

Modern C# > Java imo

3 hours ago
-MobCat-

10% tariff on every python library you include.

10 hours ago
NicholasAakre
:r:

import tariff

9 hours ago
iamveto

Underrated comment

6 hours ago
critical_patch
:py:

Omg I fucking wish. Just last week I rejected a PR from our “architect” that included math, ostensibly to use pi for something, only to instead define a constant PI as 22/7 and cast it as a str, then eventually back to a Decimal, for which he also imported the whole decimal library.

That one took me a minute to figure out how to let him down gently.

9 hours ago
ChalkyChalkson

My bash aliases had conda=mamba and pip=uv maybe I should add a rule to my linter that turns maths in numpy...

8 hours ago
16bitvoid
:py::g::rust::re::illuminati:

math is actually faster than numpy for non-array/non-matrix calculations because numpy is specifically optimized for array calculations, so there are situations where it makes sense to use math over numpy.

8 hours ago
ChalkyChalkson

Oh, interesting. Yeah I very rarely work with exclusively scalars. Tbh most of the time I import torch :/

8 hours ago
sageknight

What was his reason for not using math.pi itself. And what are you using the pi value for (beside circle circumference and area)? I've never got a chance to use pi myself outside of college.

8 hours ago
critical_patch
:py:

I’m also baffled as to why he didn’t just use math.pi cause he didn’t end up using the math library at all. I suspect he was Copilot to spit out some code without reading over it closely, since we’ve been warned we must use it for any conceivable purpose so we can leverage its value.

As for his use case, it was some quick & dirty sanity checks on how much floor space would be covered by a certain number of WiFi routers. We have planning software specifically for that but he was trying to not get into the weeds.

7 hours ago
gregorydgraham

USA bankrupts universe

9 hours ago
Facts_pls

USA is only going to bankrupt itself.

The collapse of Rome did not ruin civilization in India

7 hours ago
sosta

While that's right. The late Bronze age collapse ruined many civilization since trade was ruined.

Egypt defeated the sea peoples and still declined sharply since there was nobody else left to trade with

5 hours ago
UndulatingHedgehog

0 * 0.1.

Crikey. How will I afford beer?

9 hours ago
erebuxy
:hsk::cp::cs:

Now, do that to npm

5 hours ago
snaynay
:cs:

http and www was invented by a Brit and his team in Switzerland.

10% Tariff on both X and Truth Social please.

10 hours ago
nonsenseis OP

HTML programmers are excused. They suffered so much in memes.

Use HTML to create all software and get benefits. No one knows about HTML more than me.

8 hours ago
A_random_zy
:j:

And Java people don't suffer enough?

5 hours ago
nonsenseis OP

It's already used in 8 billion devices. So they must be used to it by now..

5 hours ago
A_random_zy
:j:

Don't kink shame us.

5 hours ago
Convoke_
:g:

Good thing https is a thing /s

6 hours ago
clauEB

Java was created at the sun microsystems campus in CA and C++ at the Bell Labs in NY. Actually NJ not NY.

9 hours ago
ShakaUVM

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bell_Labs

C++ invented in Jersey, so close enough

4 hours ago
clauEB

Correct, I meant NJ.

4 hours ago
ComprehensiveWord201

Gottem

7 hours ago
offlinesir

pretty sure java was made in California. Anyways, I've seen this meme format so many times it's really getting old.

11 hours ago
nonsenseis OP

Edited :

Java was invented by a Canadian.The language was created by James Gosling while he was working at Sun Microsystems in their California office

But James Gosling was and is a Canadian.

10 hours ago
nwbrown
:clj:

No, Menlo Park.

https://web.archive.org/web/20050420081440/http://java.sun.com/features/1998/05/birthday.html

Edit: Tarrifs don't apply to things built in the United States by immigrants.

10 hours ago
fiftyfourseventeen

So it's american invention

4 hours ago
Wertbon1789

Are you an American? Would explain why this meme is getting old.

9 hours ago
offlinesir

Yes, I am American. It's getting old because it's been on r/programmerhumor so many times to the point where, you know, it gets repetitive.

8 hours ago
KagakuNinja

It is also stupid and wrong.

8 hours ago
RiceBroad4552
:s:

This doesn't match:

To demonstrate what they saw as a possible future in digital devices, the Green Team locked themselves away in an anonymous office on Sand Hill Road in Menlo Park, cut all regular communications with Sun, and worked around the clock for 18 months. In the summer of 1992, they emerged with a working demo, an interactive, handheld home-entertainment device controller with an animated touchscreen user interface.

[ https://web.archive.org/web/20050420081440/http://java.sun.com/features/1998/05/birthday.html ]

BTW, the linked article shows their first device, an IoT device (even the term wasn't invented yet):

It was a tablet computer with wireless internet access!

Around 20 years before the Apple iPad. Just saying, to once more demonstrate how "innovative" Apple products are. All Apple sells is just cheap rip-offs. It was like that since the company started (the "revolutionary" Macintosh GUI was stolen from, I think, Xerox).

10 hours ago
gregorydgraham

Don’t get too excited, everything was actually invented at Xerox PARC

Absolutely everybody went to the same demo and stole the same ideas. Apple to Microsoft, from the mouse up.

And everyone has been pretty happy to talk about it

9 hours ago
RandomiseUsr0
:r:

Ahem, the NLS team at Stanford Research Institute would like a word…

They don’t call it “The Mother of all Demos” for nothing!

That was the project where Doug invented the mouse, those crafty Xerox people copying all the good ides

[ps] Apple paid a fortune for the ideas in the Xerox Machine then sub licensed them to Microsoft (giving away a bit too many rights because they were keen for Microsoft to write software). The truth is an erstwhile later finance director at Xerox sold the shares for short term gain, they’d be able to buy elections now if they’d held onto them.

7 hours ago
RiceBroad4552
:s:

they’d be able to buy elections now

Best metaphor for "being filthy rich" I've read in a while. 🤣

6 hours ago
RiceBroad4552
:s:

That's well know.

My point was more that everything Apple does is just a cheap rip-off. They never invented anything. But still they manage to make their cult followers believe that Apple is an innovation driver.

7 hours ago
metcalsr

You will use your state-approved rust compiler.

9 hours ago
Druben-hinterm-Dorfe

The inventors aren't Americans, but I believe all the languages came from institutions in the US.

8 hours ago
aMAYESingNATHAN
:cp: :cs:

C++ was made at Bell Labs no?

10 hours ago
nonsenseis OP

C++ was invented by Danish Bjarne Stroustrup while he was working at Bell Labs. He is a Danish computer scientist.

Edited to fix my mistake

10 hours ago
Dark_WizardDE
:py::cp::cs::ts::bash:

Bell Labs in Denmark?

10 hours ago
nwbrown
:clj:

OP doesn't realize people can immigrate.

10 hours ago
Jacewolfie
:cfs:

C# also was invented by Danish guy - Anders Hejlsberg. Also created TypeScript.

So not only Greenland can be subject to beef about.

10 hours ago
nonsenseis OP

Please wait for my bill next week. Thanks for the reminder.

8 hours ago
nwbrown
:clj:

No, it was developed by a Danish immigrant in New Jersey.

10 hours ago
mrdreka

Does he have an American citizenship? Or is it a working visa?

7 hours ago
nwbrown
:clj:

Doesn't matter. It was made in America.

6 hours ago
JulesDeathwish

"Java" has changed its name to "Coffee" in an attempt to not getting deported

10 hours ago
dukeofgonzo
:py::bash:

Because of new regulations, I have to redo my data architecture. Foreign keys are no longer allowed. It's all now One Big Beautiful Table.

8 hours ago
Drakethos
:cs:

Languages free and open source $0 10% of 0 is still 0

9 hours ago
metcalsr

Sure, but a tariff would placed on the companies using the languages, not the scripts themselves.

9 hours ago
rover_G
:c::rust::ts::py::r::spring:

Thank god SQL is safe

9 hours ago
vulpescannon

No one cares

9 hours ago
Drefs_

Linux and Git too

7 hours ago
ThePupnasty

The air we breath and the water we drink can come from outside the US. Tariffs soon.

6 hours ago
Scottz0rz
:j::kt::ts::cs:

Wasn't Java created by Sun Microsystems in Palo Alto, California?

Did you just Google "Java inventor" and see James Gosling, the primary architect, was a "Canadian computer scientist"?

He's a Canadian immigrant, the intellectual property and development was for an American company lol.

8 hours ago
Tau-is-2Pi
:cp:

C++ started out in Murray Hill, New Jersey...

9 hours ago
quickdrawesome

So was wifi

9 hours ago
1T-context-window

C++ was developed at Bell labs and Java at Sun Microsystems.

9 hours ago
sususl1k

Wasn’t C++ created at Bell Labs?

9 hours ago
X-calibreX

C++ was created for att bell labs a US company

9 hours ago
soyboysnowflake

Let’s go JavaScript baby

8 hours ago
Lost-Droids

10% tariffs on the world wide web.... See how that works

8 hours ago
i_am_bruhed

C++ made in Bell Labs which is US if i am not wrong.

8 hours ago
DM_ME_KUL_TIRAN_FEET
:sw:

Swift is all American 👍

7 hours ago
RandomiseUsr0
:r:

Designed in California? Manufactured in China no doubt

7 hours ago
DM_ME_KUL_TIRAN_FEET
:sw:

Vietnam to avoid tariffs

7 hours ago
knighthawk0811
:p:

well they're free so 10% of that is 0

7 hours ago
Roman_of_Ukraine

Remember folks that weapon of mass destruction called JavaScript invented in USA

7 hours ago
RandomiseUsr0
:r:

Excel’s formula language was designed in USA, but made Turing complete by an Englishman and a Scot - what’s the deal with that, does the full tariff apply because of the foreign import, or is it incremental based on one’s usage of lambda calculus within excel…

I’d use Excel to work it out, but it might bankrupt me!

7 hours ago
itstommygun

50% tarrif on Linux while you’re at it.

7 hours ago
BrightCold2747
:cp::p::bash::py:

Damn FOSS taking our jerbs

6 hours ago
Puzzleheaded_Good360

Use COBOL

7 hours ago
Turbulent-Garlic8467

Wait they’re tariffing computer programs now? What?

6 hours ago
SilentPugz

There’s definitely a sql to this matter .

6 hours ago
_mr_betamax_

Throw HTML in there as well!

6 hours ago
Personal-Search-2314

Dart FTW

5 hours ago
FantasticGas1836

Just wait until he discovers that open sauce does not come out of a bottle.

5 hours ago
roG_k70

On servers running Linux additionally 15%

5 hours ago
ramriot

BTW some open source licenses have weird restrictions about "use for good, not evil" which are perfectly legal, if the US administration were to fall foul of such they would be liable for massive copyright infringement.

4 hours ago
Trees_feel_too

Technically c++ was invented in the us when bjarne worked at bell labs in New Jersey

4 hours ago
_one_person

Lua is from Brazil, Roblox in shambles.

2 hours ago
PidgeonBork

Dont tell 'em about Linux

2 hours ago
BlurredSight

It would be perfectly in line with the administration to do this, taxing the US DoD and other federal Departments for using C++ and Java and starting an another infinite money glitch

10 hours ago