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"If its large enough, you wouldn't even get stretched out before you died of old age."
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They usually wait until juniper is in gatorade
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If I don’t get to see someone get ripped to shreds in 4k I’m bringing the homophobia full force
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Literally was at a mall yesterday and it was packed. Going to China to shoot up my future wife and then take her to dinner.
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Screw them Make-a-wish kids
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In Germany it is obligatory to be nude. You will be asked to leave otherwise.
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My bladder exploded two times
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I’m glad the eldritch horror that snatches people out of their reality and sentences them to an infinite cycle of torture doesn’t discriminate
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Imagine you’re crying over a deflated pastry or something, and off to one side is Mel and Sue yelling ‘CUNT CUNT CUNT CUNT'
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I didn't have "Redditor tries to argue that dragon turtles fucking humans is less weird than great apes fucking human" on my bingo card for the day
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That nice green dildo will turn red when tariffs are confirmed, if not before.
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See, this is just one of many reasons why three-year-olds aren't relationship material.
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True. All-natural kid extract is the only way to go.
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I don't mean to be rude by asking that cause I'm genuinely curious. I just feel like it's kinda obvious what this was referring to which was his testicles.
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I drew stirner with hickeys on the back of one of my partners
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"Get some suction cups, fucking dorks"
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You sous vide them but not how you'd think. You commence anal but no thrusting u just keep them in there and sous vide using anal heat.
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"Why is there teeth marks on the scrotum spoon."
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Step 1: add white Step 2: brown gone! For more information google apartheid in south africa
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"Idk, a little butter, and you can go to town on the croissalitoris"
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"Tell me you’ve never been pregnant without telling me. Imagine not know hippos are the ones who give the ultrasound."
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"How do I get the infertile trait?"
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A way to get around this is by waiting 5 mins or so, hoping that a girl from some other family comes of age
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"bro i see so many people that get a tiger and think they are invincible but they don't even know the proper angles to use and they js get molested"
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I can't imagine a worse sentence than: "you're thinking about the other guy who got fucked to death by a horse."
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